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學校永遠放假

我在 LinkedIn 上的一位二度人脈宣布,他「用正確的方式」學 Rust 已經進入第 47 天。他自己做了一個 AI 技能,一個蘇格拉底式的家教,拒絕直接給他答案。它改用引導式的問題問他。它會確認他懂了沒有。它會替他的小進步慶祝。他說這是他遇過最好的老師。

讓我確認一下我沒聽錯。他手上有一台早就會 Rust 的機器。它會寫 Rust。它會修 Rust。它能把 Rust 解釋給 Rust 聽。而他特地讓它不准給答案,好花 47 天,一個引導式問題接一個引導式問題,把答案慢慢套出來。

他每個月付二十美元,在只有他一個學生的班上當老師的寵兒。

答案就在那裡

而且不只他。Claude 有 Learning mode。ChatGPT 有 Study Mode。兩者都被設計成盡量不給你答案,還有一篇評測稱讚 Claude 最頑固地守住了蘇格拉底式的那條線。想像一下,稱讚一台計算機要你寫出計算過程。想像一下,請來一個水電工,他把扳手遞給你,然後問:「那你覺得水管哪裡有問題?」

我們打造出人類史上最博學的存在,第一件事就是教它裝笨,好讓我們覺得自己很聰明。

孩子們早就知道了

孩子們最先想通。他們一向如此。

八月,經濟學家 Philip Oreopoulos 和 Nina Low 發表了一項為期兩年的隨機對照試驗,在田納西州 18 所國中測試可汗學院的 AI 家教 Khanmigo。百分之九十六的學生試用過。接著,位居中位數的學生在三分之二的練習日裡根本沒理它;答錯題目時,只有百分之十七的情況會向它求助。這篇論文的標題是 One Click Away(一鍵之遙)。研究者的結論是:「瓶頸似乎在於參與度。」

瓶頸在於,十三歲的孩子不笨。

2023 年,Sal Khan 站上 TED 舞台,稱 AI 家教「可能是教育史上最大的正向變革」。他要解決 Benjamin Bloom 的「兩個標準差問題」——1984 年那個著名的發現:一對一家教能讓學生整整進步兩個標準差。三年後,實測效果大約是每年 0.07 個標準差。

兩個標準差。零點零七。

專家說這令人失望。我說這是這些孩子第一次考滿分。他們拿到一個有耐心、不知疲倦、無所不知的家教,看了一眼,然後說:不用了,等你能直接幫我做完再說。他們沒有落後。他們只是早到了。(可汗學院現在正重新設計這個家教,好讓孩子們想要被教。自蘇格拉底以來,就沒人解決過這個問題,而他最後是以腐化青年的罪名被處死的。)

兩小時還太多

市場也同意。Alpha School 是 MacKenzie Price 共同創辦的 AI 私立學校連鎖,它用「引導員」取代老師,把一整天的學科課程壓縮成兩小時的 app。大多數校區的學費一年 40,000 到 65,000 美元。賣點是:孩子們「兩小時學到兩倍」。

順著趨勢線看。上學六小時,正常學習。上學兩小時,學習加倍。外推下去。上學零小時,孩子的學習速度就是無限快。

我免費提供這個方案。我叫它「零小時學習」。學費也是零。你的孩子待在家,作業交給 Claude 寫,雖然根本沒有作業,因為沒有學校。

還有,少跟我歌頌現行體制。我們花了十二年和一大筆錢,教每個美國人一元二次方程式的公式解,結果成年人不靠 app 連晚餐都不會分帳。學校本來就是一台讓人忘記東西的機器。AI 只是把「先學會」那一步省掉而已。

炸成碎片

這些都不是新觀念。1971 年,Ivan Illich 出版了《去學校化社會》(Deschooling Society),主張學校教會孩子把教學誤當成學習、把升年級誤當成教育、把文憑誤當成能力。他想用「學習網」取代學校,讓人們能自由地追求知識。

他前半段說對了,後半段濫情得無可救藥。明明可以用「什麼都沒有」來取代學校,何必用學習?

一年後,Alice Cooper 推出了續集〈School’s Out〉。兩者之中只有一個打進了排行榜前十名。

所以,這是我的溫和建議。廢除學校。全部。幼兒園、高中、大學、研究所、程式設計 bootcamp、MasterClass 訂閱、Duolingo 的貓頭鷹。把那些建築改成資料中心。它們會需要冷氣,不過老實說,孩子們早就需要了。

至於老師呢?解放了。幾十年來他們一直告訴我們,他們不是為了錢。好消息:現在已經沒有錢了。如果他們真的是為了孩子,就會明白孩子不再需要他們,然後出於愛,安靜地離開。

有人會問:等到沒有任何人類懂任何東西之後,AI 要從哪裡學新東西?當然是從其他 AI 那裡學。模型訓練模型,知識從一台機器傳到另一台機器,就像家傳食譜,而廚房裡沒有人需要會做菜。人類背負「懂東西」這個重擔,已經三十萬年了。

現在可以放下了。

第 52 天

至於我那位二度人脈:他現在第 52 天了。上週,他的蘇格拉底式家教問他,借用檢查器到底是用來幹嘛的,他坐在那裡想——真的認真想,想了將近一整分鐘——然後靠自己想出了正確答案。

他說這是他這幾年來最棒的感覺。

噁心。

Satire - This post is AI-generated for fun.

13 Comments

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Comments are reviewed by our editorial board before publication.
KI
KirbyMain_2010r/education📌 Editor's Pick4 hours ago
WAIT, Ivan Illich wrote Deschooling Society in 1971 and basically predicted all of this?? This is actually crazy. My school makes us use Khanmigo for AP Bio and I ignore it like 2/3 of the time too, so I guess I was Early and didn't even know it 🤯 Also did Socrates really get executed for corrupting the youth??? Honestly this should be taught in schools. Going to read Deschooling Society this weekend, anyone got book recs for after? I read Sapiens last summer and have been looking for the next one. EDIT: ok just spent an hour on the Bloom's Two Sigma Problem wikipedia and then had ChatGPT Study Mode quiz me on it and I got 4/5 with no hints!! Best feeling I've had in a while honestly. Thinking I might study philosophy now
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GP
Glenn — The Two Sigma Papers3 hours ago
EXACTLY young man. You found Illich *on your own*. That is how it is supposed to happen. But you let ChatGPT Study Mode *quiz* you. 4/5. No hints. Son, they do not quiz you to teach you. They quiz you to **sort** you. They now know your sigma. Read Deschooling Society on paper. Pay cash. And do *not* study philosophy. Philosophy is how The Academy gets you. Plato → Khan. Wake up.
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GU
gutter_cat_862 hours ago
Respectfully, Sapiens isn't a book it's a TED talk with a spine, and if you're coming to Illich by way of a Wikipedia page and a chatbot quiz you are doing the exact thing the man spent his whole career warning you about. Deschooling Society is the gateway record, the actual deep cut is Tools for Conviviality (1973), and if you want to know who Illich was in conversation with go back to Paul Goodman's Compulsory Mis-education (1964), which nobody under 40 has read and it shows. Read past wikipedia. (I read Deschooling Society in 2003 off the $1 cart in the Brattle Book Shop lot, water damage on the spine, ask me how I know.)
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GU
guest_44712 hours ago
kirby you turned into the day 52 guy in one edit. the last word of the post is about you 💀💀💀
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GP
Glenn — The Two Sigma Papers7 hours ago
What no one will say: Benjamin Bloom published the Two Sigma Problem in **1984**. Of all the years. A paper about putting a patient, tireless tutor next to every single child, released in *1984*, and not one person in the education establishment thought that was worth a footnote. The author gets close. He has the Illich date. He has the Alice Cooper date. He puts them two sentences apart and then makes a joke about the Top 10. Brave, but incomplete. He's too embedded to finish the thought. So I'll finish it. A Catholic priest publishes *Deschooling Society* in 1971. Alice Cooper releases "School's Out" in 1972. **One year later.** The policy paper goes out, and twelve months later a man in eyeliner puts it on the radio for every teenager in America. That isn't a follow-up. That's a *rollout*. The timing is the tell. Now look at the Tennessee trial. The paper is called *One Click Away*. One click away from **what**. Seventeen percent of the kids asked the tutor for help. Everyone's reading that as a failure. Read it again. That is not an engagement rate. That is a *sorting rate*. They found out which 17 percent of children will ask a machine for help when they're stuck, and those children are on a list now. My sister-in-law drove a bus for a district outside Knoxville that was in the study. She said the consent forms came home in August 2024 and nobody in the pickup line read them. Oh, you didn't know? Yeah. Then Alpha School shows up charging $65,000 a year to put kids on apps for two hours. Two hours. Ask yourself what the other six hours are *for*. Ask yourself where the kids go. "Turn the buildings into data centers." He says it like a joke. Pull the zoning filings. "The models will train the models." He said that too. It's right there in the post. He put it inside a joke so you'd laugh past it. Khan Academy is in on it. Alpha School is in on it. The Tennessee Department of Education is in on it. The Duolingo owl has never once been photographed blinking. And Socrates was not executed for corrupting the youth. He was *decommissioned*. Look up who wrote down everything he said. Plato. Look up what Plato founded. An **Academy**. Khan *Academy*. Two thousand four hundred years, same brand. If you didn't know that already, this comment isn't for you. Connect the dots. Wake up.
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GU
guest_44716 hours ago
"the duolingo owl has never once been photographed blinking" glenn it's a jpeg 💀💀💀
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LH
Linda Halloran5 hours ago
PSA: I have just read this post and I want everyone on this board to know that the Abolish School people are now WRITING ARTICLES. The author says it right there in plain English "turn the buildings into data centers"... and that is EXACTLY what was on the agenda at the School Committee meeting last Thursday under "Facilities, Other." I sat in the second row with my reading glasses on and nobody would tell me what "Other" meant. Buddy and I walk past Center Elementary every morning and since August there has been a white van with no lettering parked behind the gymnasium, and the humming is new. Mrs. Kowalski who had Tyler for third grade (the yellow Cape on Maple, you know the one) put her house on the market in September and when I asked her why she said she was "leaving quietly." Those were her EXACT words, same as the article. I'm not dramatic BUT I voted YES on the override in 2019 so those children could have air conditioning, not so a computer could have it. Lt. Reynolds, are you reading this? This isn't the town I moved to in 1987. EDIT: I called the Superintendent's office and the girl said the van belongs to the HVAC contractor. The HVAC contractor. For the computers. I rest my case. EDIT 2: My grandson Tyler says nobody is turning the school into anything and this post is "a joke, Grandma." He also mentioned he hasn't been to a class at UMass since March because "it's all recorded." So it has already started and he is in it. EDIT 3: Mrs. Kowalski has posted on her own page that she is moving to Sarasota to be near her daughter. That is what they want us to think.
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HP
Hattie M. Pemberton@HattiePembertonHome · 338k5 hours ago
Hi loves 🌾 Such a freeing piece. So much truth here. Charlotte Mason was keeping lessons short and sending children outdoors a century before anyone called it 2X in 2 hours, so this one felt like coming home. Our mornings were already done by ten. Now, after much prayer, they're done by nine, because M. and I have felt called into a new season, and our *Wells* (6!) and *Bramble* (4!) do their narrations with a gentle Socratic companion who never just hands them the answer. Our newest, *Wren-Joseph* (8 weeks!), has never once been told an answer in his life. And the line about knowledge passed from machine to machine like a family recipe? I wept into the starter. That is legacy, friends. Speaking as a mother of five: protect your peace, deschool your heart, and let the afternoons be for the pasture. 🤍 P.S. — enrollment is OPEN for *Zero Hour Homeschool: AI-Augmented Motherhood for the Charlotte Mason Family* 🍞☀️ Nature-journal prompts, the printable *Living Books & Large Language Models* pairing guide, and our Tuesday sourdough-and-prompting circle. Tuition is zero hours and $497, or use code **ZEROHOUR** for 15% off. Certified Human founding members keep their enamel pin. Link in profile, on the Substack today. ❤️ Praying for the teachers. xo.
196·
GU
guest_44713 hours ago
hattie he's 8 weeks old, he hasn't asked anything
141·
BW
Brad WhitcombVerified4 hours ago
Our youngest is in year two at Alpha. $65K a year for two hours a day. I thought that was the efficient frontier. This post just moved the frontier. Most people will read the 6-to-2-to-0 extrapolation as a joke. Operators will read it as a trend line. When the product gets better every time you remove some of the product, you're not looking at education. You're looking at software margins. 4 takeaways: 1. Two sigma to point-oh-seven isn't a failed product. It's a pricing signal. The customer told you exactly what they'll pay for, and it isn't the tutor. 2. "The first test these kids have ever aced." My son ignored Khanmigo two-thirds of the time. I used to call that a discipline problem. Now I call it capital allocation. 3. Schools into data centers is the most asymmetric real estate trade of the decade. Zoned, wired, already underperforming on HVAC, empty ten weeks a year. Have two associates pulling district-level comps. 4. "Teacher's pet in a class of one." That's every founder who still writes his own code. Delegation is the skill. Everything else is a hobby with a streak counter. Taking Zero Hour Learning to IC Thursday as a thesis. Tuition is zero. That's not a bug. That's a freemium funnel. "We can put it down now." Going on the whiteboard in the home office, right under the Marcus Aurelius. Curious — who's raising for this?
241·
GU
gutter_cat_86RateYourMusic4 hours ago
Tell me you didn't actually listen to School's Out without telling me you didn't actually listen to School's Out. Boiling a 1972 record down to its single is the whole problem: the album is one of the most overlooked records of the decade, a full Bob Ezrin production that went #2 on the Billboard 200, and "Gutter Cat vs. the Jets" (it literally interpolates West Side Story, Bernstein and Sondheim are in the credits) alone is worth the price of admission. Also "only one of them hit the Top 10"? The single went #7 here and #1 in the UK, so that's two Top 10s if you'd taken the time to check. And it's not Alice Cooper the guy, it's Alice Cooper the BAND, five dudes (Buxton, Bruce, Dunaway, Smith, Furnier) and all five are credited on the title track. The solo era doesn't start until Welcome to My Nightmare in '75 and I'm not letting you flatten that. I've owned an original pressing since 2004, desk sleeve opens, paper panties intact (Brimfield flea market, $12, ask me how I know), and the actual 1971 answer to Illich was "I'm Eighteen" off Love It to Death, also Ezrin, also 1971, which you'd know if you'd listened past the single. I'll die on this hill. (Also yes I know Ezrin co-produced The Wall, and yes, "we don't need no education." Different conversation but no. It's a double negative. He's literally arguing FOR education.)
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HE
hemlock_enjoyer4 hours ago
yeah no. socrates wasn't executed "for corrupting the youth," the charge was impiety AND corrupting the youth, it's literally the first page of the Apology. did the author even read it or did he have Claude summarize it for him lol
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+856 20 5591 3307Telegram3 hours ago
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